We define ourselves by what we think, others define us by what we do.

Do I see the look of a believer?

I have started training for the Triathlon Season. I started early this year because the previous two years Angela, my trainer has killed me with a twelve week burst leading up to one event. This of course has been my choice and, given that for the prior part of the year I had not trained at all,  this was all she had to work with. This year I was determined to have two things happen. I would be ready to be able to use the twelve week training session that we have with Angela to it’s maximum and, I would have fun getting there.

Last week I had an epiphany; I was running my second 5K and I could hear all of the familiar little voices in my head saying quit, why are you doing this to yourself, you were a lousy runner when you were 20 why do you think you can be any good now you are nearly sixty. To silence the voices I thought, instead of thinking I could not do it why don’t I simply think that I could? In that instant my whole approach to running changed.It suddenly changed from the conversation being one of difficulty to one of ease. It changed from one of struggle to one of joy and from one of failure to one of success. 

Young people today are beset with the challenges of reaching a standard in school that is nothing short of painful and they are made to think from an early age that the successes and failures that they gain in what is a very short part of their lives, defines who they are now and who they will become in there future. Are you going to University? No?Then what that means is...You are going to University, then you will almost certainly be a success. All that has happened here is that the students choice has made the teacher feel better about themselves and not really helped the student at all.

My thinking has defined me all of my life and, while I have read many books and am an avid TED Talk enthusiast and I am told every day that I have a positive attitude, it was only last week as I turned the corner and faced an absolute bitch of a hill to finish the last 1 1/2K of my run that I understood the power of my own thoughts. Suddenly all of the doubts that I had brought along for company were replaced with the successes that I also have had over my lifetime. In that one thought I redefined who I was and proceeded to knock a minute and a half off my best time.

I know that this stuff works but I have never seen it work so well as it did that day because of one small equation; ‘Thought plus Action’. What I learned was the most important lesson  of all, one that is missed by even the best motivational thinkers; nothing changes for the better or worse until action follows thought. Usually a negative thought is followed by no action, however, that in of it’s self is action. Having a positive thought must be followed directly by the same value of positive action otherwise it is simply a warm and fussy thought leaving you just as unfulfilled on the other side. If we are to be the person we think we are, we must be willing to take action on those thoughts. As we take more and more action so we add to our bank account of confidence and we generate more and more equity in that account to spend on our future.

Live Passionately, Think Positive!

Do These Jeans Make My Butt Look Big?

I wrote this when I was 55 it still rings true.

Do these jeans make my butt look good? I mean; for crying out loud, I’m 59 not dead. I’m not asking for the attention of young women to feed my male ego, actually I would feel quite awkward if a woman young enough to be my daughter made a pass at me or my butt for that matter. No, what I really want is to look good in jeans again, just for a few more years.

The thing is, these days we all look better than our parents did, look what they had to go through, a war, rationing, and terrible working conditions. No wonder they all looked middle aged by the time they were 30. The problem is that we feel better, we have better diets and better health care, so it’s obvious that we are going to look better. So at 59 I still want to look good, at least to my wife and I still want my best feature to look good in a pair of Levis. The question is of course, how do we pull that off?

The challenge is to juggle a job and a family and still find time to take care of ones self. As the years roll by we see less and less of our knees due in part to the evidence of too many late night snacks and trips to McDonalds with the kids. For most men the largest and most exercised muscle in their body is their thumb from using the remote.

“Grab us a nuvver beer luv, sein as yer up” 

Hardly the sexual magnet she fell in love with. I think most guys are the same when it comes to it, when we strip off at night we want the woman we fell in love with to raise her eyebrows and look twice. In fairness we expect them to look great even after having given birth to a couple of times, maybe we should make some effort as well.

Live passionately, ask why!

The Thought Of Succeeding

There have been many times in life when we think about giving up. Sometimes it’s on school, sometimes on work, other times it’s on a relationship or trying to get a promotion. The thing is, most of the time it is just a thought and nothing else. However, if you have had that thought and then taken action on it, you will know how hollow it leaves you feeling.

Don’t get ‘Giving up’ mixed up with ‘Failing’ though, it is not one and the same. Failing is part of life and to fail often and sometimes in a grand way usually means that we are trying to achieve something big and giving your all and failing at something big and life changing big should be a badge of honour. All of the other failures in life are simply a way of regrouping and trying something different.

The thing is, a lot of the time failing, quitting and giving up simply start with a thought and nothing more. Likewise succeeding is the result of the same thing, it all starts with just a thought. We do not wake up one morning and find ourselves at the top of Everest and wonder how we got there. We do not suddenly find that we have a number one smash hit and wonder how that happened and we don't suddenly win an Olympic gold medal and say to the guy who is receiving the silver medal, “What is this celebration for and why are we here” All of these things and the many other events in our life all started as a thought and remained that way until action was taken to make that thought a reality.

We hear every day of people who against ridiculous odds achieve amazing things. Things such as; Sir Ranulph Fiennes, climbing Mount Everest at 65 after his third attempt. The first time he was stopped because  of a heart attack and the second time due to exhaustion. He is now the oldest British climber to make the ascent and also the first pensioner. Walt Disney went bankrupt after a failed deal in 1922, today Disney is one of the most successful and respected brands in the world. Einstein did not speak until he was four years old, Richard Branson did not attend University and has Dyslexia, Jim Carrie was homeless, Stephen Kings first novel was rejected 30 times and the richest person in the world, Bill Gates saw his fist business fail. The list goes on and on and has been the subject of many books but the point is, it was only a thought in the heads of these and many other people and it was only a thought that gave them the idea to be successful.

Three years ago I competed in the London Triathlon and this year will be my third one. All my life I have started the conversation about my running ability with the statement “I am not very good” going through my thoughts. This statement lead to, and therefore I will fail. Just a thought, a simple thought. This year I have started training early as part of my celebration of my 60th birthday in August, the difference is though, this year I have started with the thought that “I will succeed.” My running is so much easier, it was like lifting a weight from my shoulders and I feel tangibly better about myself. I have also found that because I own the success of my running I can bank it in my ‘Self Esteem’ bank account and the equity is measurable. It has taken on a physicality and it is changing my life.

This blog was originally titled ‘The Thought Of Failure’ but as I was running on Monday I changed that to ‘The Thought Of Succeeding’ and with it my entire attitude.

Think Big! Dare To Win!